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May. 6th, 2009 06:51 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
kat8chaSo, my dad runs this play festival that's put on by the kids at his old school. He did it while he was teaching there, but he's ONLY doing this year now that he's retired. He will not do next year. I've told him he's not allowed. It stresses him out, and without his input the kid's... well, the new writing teacher isn't really very good.
Anyway, one of the plays is about this girl named Bill, who lives in Roman times with her cross-dressing landlord/lady, and a neighbor named Mister Clever who's hard of hearing. Bill is told by the doctor she's going to die, ends up sacrificing herself in place of 'the prophet' and etc. Anyway, it's pretty terrible. But see, my dad voiced Mister Clever who confuses 'the doctor says I'm going to die' with 'Mrs. Schrocter brought some pie' and calls Bill 'Phil'. And I just...
I can make this BETTER darn it. D:
Bill: (enters stage left and walks down stage until she is down-stage center, she holds in her hands a crumpled piece of white paper) Hi. (waves at the audience) Hi. I'm Bill. I know, I know, I don't look like a Bill. But see, my full name is Wilhelmina Quincy Harker. My dad was big into Dracula, I think because he and Jonathan Harker had the same last name. Anyway, I can't exactly go around as 'Mina Harker' now can I? Anyone would recognize that. And Wilhelmina is really more than a mouthful. When I was younger I was a bit of a tomboy and well... Bill just works. So yes, hello, I'm Bill. And I have the plague. Oh! No, no, no, don't go away! No, hold on, I don't REALLY have the plague. I'm just... I'm scheduled to GET the plague. I know, I know, that doesn't make much sense does it? But, see, last year I joined this religious commune and...
--
Bill: (opens door) Oh, hello there, Mrs. Schrocter.
Mrs. Schroctor: Hello Bill dear. I brought over some pie for Mister Clever.
Bill: ...oh. I'll just, call up to him and tell him that you're here. MISTER CLEVER. MRS. SCHROCTOR'S HERE.
Mr. Clever: (from offstage) WHAT? DID YOU SAY THERE WAS A DOCTOR? I DON'T LIKE DOCTORS.
Bill: ...MISTER CLEVER. MRS. SCHROCTOR BROUGHT YOU A PIE.
Mr. Clever: THE DOCTOR SAYS YOU'RE GOING TO DIE?! I DON'T WANT YOU TO DIE PHIL. I LIKE YOU! ALMOST AS MUCH AS I LIKE PIE.
Bill: ...just go on up, Mrs. Schroctor.
(curtain)
TA DA! ...yeah, I know, it's bad. XD
Anyway, one of the plays is about this girl named Bill, who lives in Roman times with her cross-dressing landlord/lady, and a neighbor named Mister Clever who's hard of hearing. Bill is told by the doctor she's going to die, ends up sacrificing herself in place of 'the prophet' and etc. Anyway, it's pretty terrible. But see, my dad voiced Mister Clever who confuses 'the doctor says I'm going to die' with 'Mrs. Schrocter brought some pie' and calls Bill 'Phil'. And I just...
I can make this BETTER darn it. D:
Bill: (enters stage left and walks down stage until she is down-stage center, she holds in her hands a crumpled piece of white paper) Hi. (waves at the audience) Hi. I'm Bill. I know, I know, I don't look like a Bill. But see, my full name is Wilhelmina Quincy Harker. My dad was big into Dracula, I think because he and Jonathan Harker had the same last name. Anyway, I can't exactly go around as 'Mina Harker' now can I? Anyone would recognize that. And Wilhelmina is really more than a mouthful. When I was younger I was a bit of a tomboy and well... Bill just works. So yes, hello, I'm Bill. And I have the plague. Oh! No, no, no, don't go away! No, hold on, I don't REALLY have the plague. I'm just... I'm scheduled to GET the plague. I know, I know, that doesn't make much sense does it? But, see, last year I joined this religious commune and...
--
Bill: (opens door) Oh, hello there, Mrs. Schrocter.
Mrs. Schroctor: Hello Bill dear. I brought over some pie for Mister Clever.
Bill: ...oh. I'll just, call up to him and tell him that you're here. MISTER CLEVER. MRS. SCHROCTOR'S HERE.
Mr. Clever: (from offstage) WHAT? DID YOU SAY THERE WAS A DOCTOR? I DON'T LIKE DOCTORS.
Bill: ...MISTER CLEVER. MRS. SCHROCTOR BROUGHT YOU A PIE.
Mr. Clever: THE DOCTOR SAYS YOU'RE GOING TO DIE?! I DON'T WANT YOU TO DIE PHIL. I LIKE YOU! ALMOST AS MUCH AS I LIKE PIE.
Bill: ...just go on up, Mrs. Schroctor.
(curtain)
TA DA! ...yeah, I know, it's bad. XD
